Welcome back to our blog 1Beginner!
Great life doesn’t happen, you have to make it happen! @ Mahendra Kapady.
This post is in the format of Me writing to Me. The Fake Me/The Outer Me to the Honest Me!
I am writing this post in a format that I am writing to myself, in a way I am counselling myself, I am honestly talking with myself without any filter, without any if’s & but’s & because’s. I am vacating myself from within.
My conversation with mother –
I said to my mom- “Mom I am not happy with what I am doing, I want to explore myself, I want to do something different.” she said- Okay, then Do it. I said how can I? I don’t have enough time with Me! I am just juggling. I can’t manage two lives in one time frame. I am going to quit the job. She said – What? Are you crazy?
She Continued – You have such a good job! Such a good salary. You have a Car! You have the House (Which I sold in fact.) You have a dream Life that everyone craves. I Said Mom its a life of comfort & luxury but its not the life of dreams for me! I don’t feel good the way I am living. She Said why? You are so successful in this career! I said No mom I am not really successful in this context. She said why do you feel like that? Ask anyone- Everyone say you are successful? I said – may be for them I am successful but for me I am definitely not! Because they are seeing me a successful for what I have but I am seeing myself successful for what I really want to be! I believe People define or calibrate the success from very different standards. The current life I am living is success from the standards of society but in my standards I am doing bare minimum. I am not at all utilizing my potential.
The conversation ended up in a heated argument, where mom finally gave up saying – “You Are Eccentric & Unmanageable freak. there is no point talking with you” I feel that’s completely alright. I am Rebel.
The Life of Purpose –
Later on I kept on thinking & I penned down my thoughts. I really feel we should live a life of purpose. We should calibrate the standards of success on our own! We should really live what we want to be, not what society, family, people around us want to be! (I am saying this in ethical point of view.)
But most of us have a very big question – But what is purpose of my life? I don’t know! Yeah, I do agree! And I have a answer for that – if you don’t have the purpose, then “Finding the purpose is the main purpose of your life.” Is that easy? of course not. How would you find it? I don’t know. That you have to sort out on your own. When you would find it? Tomorrow, week later, month later, a year later, I don’t know! I can’t answer that for you. Still, you got to keep looking for it! No one can help you find the answer but you!
You would find the thing you aspire if you keep looking for it but if you wait for it to fall in your lap, maybe you would never! @ Mahendra Kapady
Thanks For The Life So Far –
I always had a good start in everything. I had a pretty decent life till my college days & wonderful life overall. But still I don’t feel alright. Why? because I am really not doing what I intend to do! Even though I had to wait for a while, but I got everything what I expected for. Even though, I struggled & hassled for a while but I really never had to desperately fight for anything. Thanks to god, he really gave me everything where I pointed my finger at! The point I want to make here – start something because you love or want not as an escape reason from the life which you are pissed off, because if you will you would carry the same energy with you and make mess of the the time forward.
Give Your Dreams a Decade-
I gave 10 years of my life to the school. I gave 10 years of my life to my high-school & college education, I gave 10 years of my life to comfort zone, luxury, society standards, and family expectations. & in the process I starved my dreams. I literally forgot what I Am? What I really want to be?
So, I have decided to give my dreams their time. I decided to give them a chance they want! I am going to give my dreams a decade. I am going to give myself 10 years to pursue my dreams. I am going to give myself a chance to live my purpose (Including finding my purpose)
Matthew Mcnoughey said – ” we all have a hill to climb in our life, but first decide which is my hill?” and I feel that’s absolutely true.
In accordance with Mcnoughey – I strongly believe we all have to ascend the hill in our life and before that we need to make sure that we are climbing the right hill. There is no point in reaching the top & waving your hand if you are not sure whether you have climbed the right hill! You need to Find & access your hill before you climb to the top. and the agony is nobody is going to point you the hill, you have to find that hill on your own. And maybe you would not get that in first attempt or second or even in third, still you got to keep looking. Sometime when you climb the hill to some extent and you may come to know that’s not my hill and you need to step down again, that’s okay. Still, Never settle until you get your hill.
Diving in The Life of Desperation – I feel there is no point in getting successful, reaching the top, earning lot of money in the field you are not really happy about. whereas it would be really great to live (not so financial wealthy) life in the field you love, because it would give you satisfaction and that would be your ultimate wealth. I would never say Money is not everything! Still, if you work in the field you love & if you evolve as somebody worthy then money would never be a problem. Chase the thing love, money would follow with passion & commitment.
I heard the lines from the latest song, which really touched my heart-
Kya kaam voh kaaam jisme tu safal nahi! Kya kaam ka voh kaam jisme tera kal nahi!
A desire to experience the real desperation-
I strongly believe we live the life where success is guaranteed, not what we really love & dream! Why because it can frustrate you and make you look desperate in the need of success and no one wants to look desperate.
I never really failed, never really saw desperation in my life. May be I never aspired for something big. I want to chase something gigantic, something that very few have ever thought & pulled off. So, I want to experience that struggle, desperation in life. I want to take the leap of faith! and in the process I might fail and that’s okay, I am not looking for any overnight success.
Undergo The Process of Elimination –
We all want to be somebody special in something. Do we find it automatically? Not at all. We need to find what we really want to be? we all are confused about what we really want to be? What can I be? What is my genuine calling? Even I was confused by the time I was 25. I was confused from 20 to 25. Then I decided to give the things a go. See, you have to undergo the process of elimination. In order to know what is right for you, you got to eliminate what is not right for you! In order to understand or find what is working for you, you got to go through some things, some experiments, and some different ways. Then you would understand that this thing is not working for me, this thing is not for me & you have to de-clutter your mind from the confusion.
See, you may find your calling after eliminating 11 options. So, do not wait in a feeling that after 3 years, somehow I would get my calling. You have to go through the process of elimination. I.e. by those 11 options. That is what really designs your character, craft your personality.
Vivekananda has said “zindagi ka marg bana bananya nahi milta, banana padata hai! Jisne jaisa marg chuna use vaisi raah mili.”
See, there is no right age to start. The Right time is always now. You could be thinking 5 years prior was the right time to start, but trust me five years later you would be thinking the same. You would be saying that five years prior (today) could have been the right time. Why? it’s how we have been programmed, either to live in the past or in future. Either to regret about past or fear about future. You want to start. So, start now. Right time & Right age is always now!
Stop taking people’s opinion & comments. Life is yours, take the plunge now.
Why don’t we reinvent ourselves?
Great life demand courage.We do not reinvent ourselves because of 2 things either fear of failure or in the love of comfort zone, both the things are very dangerous in long term. The fear of failure would paralyze you & the comfort zone would punish you. You always get punished by being into comfort zone. Wisdom, growth & accomplishment are always beyond the comfort zone, you always got to push yourself beyond the comfort zone to discover yourself, who you really are!
Why Reinventing Myself?
I strongly believe you don’t have to necessarily live on one fixed path in your life! You can always discover something more out of life at any moment of life. I can definitely discover something more out of my life. And there is something bigger waiting for me, I want to discover that. Even though I am working good on my job or doing fairly well in my life, I strongly know that I am not tapping full to my potential. I haven’t even accessed 5% of my potential. We all have a legend within us, But we have kept him under the shadow of comfort & let him sleep. I really have to find the genuine legend in me. I really want to tap my potential & Be Somebody.
So, I am taking a chance to reinvent myself, Are You?
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Shared & Edited by Mahendra Kapady@2019, All rights reserved.