Welcome back to my blog 1Beginner!
Once in a life we face a situation where Most of us feel that we are stuck. I had been through such situation almost twice times in my life. once I had been through Financial mess & another while I was going through family & personal issues.
I feel I am fortunate enough that I had went Through such situations at my young age, when I was just 25-26. We all feel like this a dead end of our life & there is no way out or no way going further. The situation can be different for everyone of us but I am sure each one of us must had been though or going though such situation.
You must have heard the saying – Everything happens for A Reason! but have you really understood the meaning behind it, have you really employed it ? The time when you had been through a sort of dead end situation – Have you really Bold enough, grown enough to show the wisdom to stand above the situation & explore the possibilities, Potential for growth, New perspectives than just focusing on the problems. Have you thought anything other than Why Me Attitude? Have you ? If yes. Share your views with Me!
In-fact I would go a step beyond and say Everything happens for a Good Reason to evolve the Great person within You! To explore the potential of greatness within You!
So, For such sort situation you need to ask yourself 4 major questions.
1. Why this situation has Arise? Who is responsible ?
I am asking this question not to blame someone but to find the root cause. You need to see why this situation has actually came up? what is the major reason? What really triggered the events to arrive Me at this outcome. Because in my view disaster is not a one day event, its a cumulative result of small disasters mounted one above the another, which is revealed One day after a long while. So, Its not other person but there can be too many reasons responsible for your current failure or setback, which has made you feel stuck. It can be your Ignorance, lack of skill, Procrastination, your laziness, Your lack of Planning, blind faith over others or anything else. You need to find these reasons & note it down, so it wouldn’t be repeated in your next events & you can safeguard yourself from next probable disaster.
See, I need to understand that no matter what happened in your life, it doesn’t matter who cheated you! who fooled you! or did hurt you! You got to understand that there is only one person responsible for your situation! Its none other than You! You did not study people, you did not do analysis, you did trust wrong people, you blindly gave your power to them. So, Its you not them! Its You & Only You! So, do not cry over the spilled milk now! Take The Responsibility & Move On! Say ” I Am Responsible.” & start working towards new possibilities.
2. What this situation is trying to Teach me? Whats the lesson in there?
If you have encountered any situation or Problem, You need to access the situation from Third person perspective & explore the learning from that situation. Every failure or setback has a potential learning in it. You need to stand a step above than the situation for a while, Keep all pessimistic thoughts, Why Me attitude away for a while and scan the situation from start to end. Not to find mistakes but to locate the pitfalls, Why did you ignore, where did you overlook & fell flat on face. You need to be honest & ask yourself – What this situation is What this situation is trying to teach Me? This question is much more powerful than Why Me? which drains your power. It just needs a Honesty, Perspective & little bit of wisdom that we all have, nothing else. If you ask a question honestly to yourself I am sure you would not Cry, blame or whine about the situation anymore. I do that every time I experience any sort of loss or unwanted experience, no matter big or small. I scan the situation from start to end, I imbibe the learning & erase the threads of event from my mind. In future when I recall, my mind directs me to learning experience not as Bad Experience.
3. How can I use this situation to my advantage? How can I get the best out of this situation!
Willy Jolly – famous writer of book “it takes only a minute to change your life” said Every setback is a setup for a comeback! You have to design your setup to bounce-back from the situation you had been through. If you have lost all what you have, now you end up having nothing so what can you do now? When you have nothing, You are open for everything! You can start from any place,any time , any how than getting stuck. You have nothing to hold you back, all moves are right for You. Everything is Right for the man of desperation. Failure is not bad but its necessary in order to grow. Success makes you lazy but failure makes you restless, make you aware, keep you awake. Failure gives you an important thing i.e. Feedback that Success doesn’t offer you at all. You can leverage this Feedback, apply in your future actions to propel you forward. You can definitely use this situation to your advantage if you look for advantage than the loss.
4. What are the possibilities from Here?
You have to become The man of possibilities. You must become a possibility scanner in every situation. You need to look for possibilities beyond pitfalls. Any situation, no matter how challenging it may be it always gives you two possibilities to choose from Either to bow down to life or to to fight with all you have! You can be pitiful or you can be Powerful! You have to see the possibilities how you can leverage the situation to rise as a Victor than settling for Victim. See, Your Life Moves forward & grows bigger when you start hunting for possibilities but it comes to grinding halt or starts going backward when you close your eyes & keep on discussing the problems and how unfortunate you are. You need to decide what to look for? Possibilities or Problems?
My Confession –
See, you never get stuck, You prefer to stay stuck! Its a result of your deliberate unconscious choice. Even though I say/I feel I did stuck in my life twice, I feel it was the problem of my perspective, because I met few people who were in catastrophic situation (that no one can even imagine) than I had been through, these people never felt that they were stuck, they just consider it as a Challenge they have to overcome & they kept a resolve and they did come out of it! Without making a big issue out of it. Why? Because they Never Felt that they are Stuck!
See, Its not what you have/had been through, its how you see through!
If liked please share with you loved ones, help you unstuck from the situation.
-Written by Mahendra Kapady@2018,All rights Reserved.